A couple weeks ago, Beppi Crosariol, the wine writer for the Globe and Mail, wrote a column raving about a new addition to the LCBO, an Argentinean red called “Fuzion” Shiraz Malbec ($7.95, LCBO #83188). He told readers to run, not walk, to pick up this bargain, since it outperforms many wines selling for $20. Beppi wields enormous influence over the corkscrews of Ontario. Since his article on Fuzion, I can’t count the number of people who have asked me if I’ve tried it (including a general counsel who came into my office today and seemed more interested in the merits of Fuzion than he was in my latest case).
I love a cheap wine, and I’ve noted that many of my readers seem to as well, so I dutifully trucked out to the liquor store to try to find some Fuzion – but the cupboards were bare. Everyone I spoke with at the LCBO was exasperated; Beppi seems to have a talent for writing about wine just as its supplies are dwindling.
As Beppi notes in his latest column, Ontario has slowly begun refilling with Fuzion, and I finally found my bottle last Thursday. Hand poised on the screw cap, I held my breath – could this be the Holy Grail? A completely satisfying bottle that costs less than a venti latte?
The verdict? Not so much the Holy Grail is an improved version of Yellow Tail.
Yellow Tail Shiraz ($11.95, LCBO #624544) is the wine that wine lovers love to hate: one-dimensional, saturated in fruit, and yet incredibly ubiquitous. Yellow Tail is smooth, goes down easy, and has mild flavours. Yellow Tail is like the Coors Light of the wine world. Snobs dismiss Coors as piss, but some people don’t actually want a strong tasting drink. If your beverage is asking anything of you (even that you take the trouble to taste it), then drinking it is too much like work.
Fuzion has strong advantages over Yellow Tail. First of all, it is much cheaper. Secondly, it tastes much better. Whereas Yellow Tail is soggy with vanilla syrup, Fuzion maintains a lively acidity that keeps it refreshing and good with food (especially BBQ). Fuzion is also more complex, with a mix of bruised plums, stewed berries, and mocha. What it lacks is tannins, earthiness, elegance, depth, richness or nuance. But that’s OK. Sometimes you don’t want a serious wine – you just want a tasty beverage for cheap. I would certainly prefer Fuzion over a Pepsi, and you can be sure I will smuggle a bottle in with me the next time a dine at this fantastic restaurant I’ve just discovered. Perhaps you’ve heard of it: Harveys.
Matthew Sullivan is a lawyer with the Department of Justice in Toronto. He writes a weekly blog entry here on lawandstyle.ca. The Short Cellar column appears in the print edition of Precedent. Matthew can be reached at matthew@lawandstyle.beta-site.ca