The kinder, gentler method of firing an employee

Ditch brutal and impersonal firing methods in favour of kindness and professionalism, otherwise you may live to regret it
Ditch brutal and impersonal firing methods in favour of kindness and professionalism, otherwise you may live to regret it

 A dear friend was recently let go by her law firm. It was not pretty. She was ambushed by four partners in the main boardroom under the guise of meeting about a new transaction. Why do some firms still persist in using such savage and underhanded methods for dismissal? It’s so unnecessary.

Even in the best of circumstances, losing a job has been ranked as one of the most traumatic life experiences a person can have, right up there with divorce and the death of a pet. We are at our most human and fragile in times of crisis. Firms know this, yet far too many deal very poorly with feelings, especially we the hoofed creatures of law.

Most of us abhor confrontation and work hard to suppress our “feelings” at the office. The justifications frequently cited by firms for the “stealth firing” is fear of information theft, sabotage and loss of office morale. And let’s face it, the last thing you want is some blubbering associate curled up in a fetal position on your office carpet. Employers want things dealt with swiftly and antiseptically, with minimal disruption of business and DNA transfer. It is easier to devise a system than to engage with the raw feelings of another human being.

Ever the opportunists, consultants, that opaque race of vultures, have manufactured a burgeoning market for “employee transition services” in an attempt to sanitize and streamline the corporate dismissal process. This phenomenon was immortalized in the film Up in the Air, starring George Clooney.

If you choose to pursue such brutal, secretive and impersonal firing methods, then know this: a former employee with an axe to grind is like a blood-thirsty homicidal elephant. She will not forget and she will strike against you and your firm when she gets the chance. Keep in mind that you cannot predict what this employee’s career trajectory is going to be after she leaves your firm. Remember karma? While protecting the interests of the firm is a perfectly reasonable concern, letting go of an employee, even a bad one, need not result in that individual being emotionally scarred for life. Be nice.

Of course, there is such a thing as being too nice. A former colleague was saddled with the unenviable task of firing associates because he was considered the nice guy. In his earlier more naive days, he would go on and on offering tender words of encouragement and support, sometimes (gasp!) even a hug. He quickly figured out that channelling Oprah is probably just as traumatic to a shell-shocked associate as calling security. There is a compassionate middle ground.

One day, dear reader, you may be called upon to execute the unpleasant task of firing someone. It behooves you to be direct, professional and kind in that moment. Lay-offs and forced resignations are a reality, especially in today’s precarious economic market. Markets do bounce back, however, as do people. You never know where the employee that you fired will end up. If the deed was done humanely, with a sympathetic face, a handshake, and an offer of assistance, you and the firm will be remembered favourably. Who knows, you might even be rewarded with a new client some time down the line.


Sandra Rosier is a former Supreme Court of Canada clerk who has worked at large firms in Toronto and Boston. Having come to her senses, Sandra currently works as a tax advisor at a Toronto-based organization. Her etiquette column for lawyers appears every other Monday at lawandstyle.ca. Got a question for Sandra? Email us.

Image: Gage Skidmore via Wikimedia Commons